Losing My Religion: The Catholic Church Is Losing Me

Pope Francis

Pope Francis

When I was a baby, I was baptized into the Catholic Church. In my youth, I went through catechism and had my Holy Communion ceremony. I went to mass every Sunday morning.

Fast forward, I’m 27 years old and it’s been months since I’ve been to church.

It feels like I’ve outgrown the Catholic Church. The Catholic Church and I are like a couple who are now into different things and there doesn’t seem to be any point in staying together anymore. Basically, I’m telling the Catholic Church, “It’s not you, it’s me”, or to borrow another romantic movie cliché,

“I love you Catholic Church, but I’m not just in love with you.”

The world is dynamic and more globalized. It’s ever changing with its views on social and moral issues. The Catholic Church however seems to be stagnant in that aspect. The church is basically stuck in the past. In this modern day and age, the Catholic Church still considers some basic things as sinful in the eyes of God. For instance, the church says that contraception is sinful.

Contraception = sinful?? The Catholic Church thinks you deciding to wear a condom or go on birth control is wrong in the eyes of God. I don’t know about you, but I think God has more things to worry about that me wearing protection during sex.

Even when it comes to marriage, the church seems old. If you’re married but the marriage just doesn’t seem to be panning out and you want a divorce, the church actually frowns upon it. So if your spouse is treating you like a second class citizen and you want to divorce him or her, the church is going to label you a sinner.

Oh, and don’t even THINK about ever getting an abortion. That’s a sin too.  But what if you were raped and got pregnant? Does that still apply? Yeah, you bet it does. You’re still a sinner in the church’s view. I can go on about the whole abortion thing but that’s another topic for discussion.

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The church can be really judgmental except when it comes to their own. Do you remember that whole church pedophile case? A whole catholic church covering up cases where priests inappropriately touched children…

I think my last straw with the church was with the issue of gay marriage. Now, I have my own opinions about gay marriage. I can’t explain how two people of the same sex can fall in love with each other and want to get married. But you know what; let them do what they want to do. Who am I to judge? But you know who’s very judgmental on that issue? The Catholic Church.

The whole thing about the institution of marriage is changing in this modern landscape. Couples go to the alter of God and pledge to stick with each other for better and for worse and after a year or two, they decide to call it quits because marriage is not what they were told it was. Why should we deny that misery to gay couples?

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Like I started earlier, I can’t remember the last time I went for mass. Have you ever gone to mass in a Catholic church? Well, you shouldn’t because you will be bored out of your skull. It’s all repetitive and sometimes it feels a little cult-ish. The whole standing up and sitting and the whole congregation repeating prayers at the same time and speed has become a little awkward for me. Yeah, that can be a bit creepy if you’re not used to it.

The only silver lining that the Catholic Church has at the moment is their new Pope: Pope Francis. You can tell that he’s really different. Believe me, he’s WAY better than the last one who quit, erm, I mean “retired”. His views on gay marriage and other social issues run counter to the views of the Church as a whole. I like him, but I’m still indifferent to the Church and its teachings.

In conclusion, the church and I have decided to separate. Once in a blue moon, I do go to mass for a special occasion like Easter or Christmas but my heart is not in it. Eventually, I think I’ll just stop going altogether, to stop the whole charade.

So this is my break up message:

“I’m sorry Catholic Church, but I’m breaking up with you. We can still be friends. It’s not you, it’s me. I think we should see different people.”


Billy Hilly says:

You rightly say that you have not been to Mass for a long time. Perhaps if you had been recently and more frequently you would see things differently. You probably last went when you were a child, and like all children were bored because you were dragged there by your parents. Try the Mass as a grown up, don’t go there for your mama, got for yourself, and go often and lets see if you feel any different!

Sorry to disappoint you but I have been to church this year and it’s still the same to me. Same routines, same stories, same everything

GoldenGurl says:

I love this piece. I’m sure it resonants with a lot of people. I do understand the retraction from the church. I do also feel a need to consider a relationship with God that can exist regardless of attending a church.

Joe says:

Thanks. I think a lot of people share your opinion

Jamea says:

Catholic to me is the most unchanging church in the world and even though I can say every other church has some lame doctronr, the Catholic doctrine that contraceptives are bad is deeply inhumane and shows the churches gross disregard for human life.

How can you say or promote that aids affected people should have free intercourse because using a condom is bad.

Joe 1 says:

i’m not Catholic but I will have to disagree with you on quite a number of the issues raised.Truth is majority of the issues you raised are not peculiar to the Catholic church.It runs through majority of the churches because it is still stemming from the Bible and the Bible is not modified over time to suit modern society.Societal standards may change over time but God’s standards have not changed. The only issue i will agree on is the issue of contraception because there is no explicit condemnation of that in the Bible.The case people use is where someone spilled his semen and got punished but i dont see that as grounds to say contraception is a sin.

Jamea says:

What how do you know God’s standard; what you forget or most people fail to take note is the fact that the time the Bible was written influenced greatly the words, the taboos and also the requirements. If the Bible was being written today, it will feature iphones and stuff with modern taboos. When society grows, binding morals collected into assumed holy books ought to be re-examined and the catholic church has failed to do this.

So what you call God’s standard is what some people at a particular era regarded as expected from them by God.

Joe 1 says:

I know God’s standard is His word..If He wants to rewrite it or change His word,I believe He would have changed it by now.Undoubtedly there are some things explicitly not stated in the Bible as wrong probably due to the fact that it was not common in that time.An example might be p**nography ,but in those cases,His word still holds true, all things are lawful,but not all things are expedient. oh and if you are saying the Bible is an assumed Holy Book,it means you dont believe it as God’s word and in that case,you would not appreciate my argument.